nccotus

my son is telling me that New York won’t EVER recover. It is our sick shame. But the United States of America stands United, a great country with its ins and outs nonetheless.

yes we imported slaves from Africa. Yes we ripped this precious and beautiful land from natives who had lived here undisturbed for tens of thousands of years. Might doesn’t make right but it does win.

consider the film “Midnight Cowboy,” about New York so eerie and sad. In the end the cripple dies on the bus on the way to Florida and his friend a gigolo from the Midwest who thought he would make it in New York by having sex with woman but is trying to save the Dustin Hoffman character…??? He’s left alone on the bus to Florida with 50 dollars and not a tie in the whole world. That’s as I remember it. In other words, New York was an exciting place that destroyed people. Then there’s the movie “After Hours,” similarly themed on a lighter note.

Happened to me. Happened to my brother. I tried to warn him. My mother was so taken and jealous and hurt by the lifestyle I was leading with New Yorker college boyfriend Mark and I didn’t see it at all how it was hurting my brother.

here it is 45 years later and I am picking myself up off the floor. First, the Manhattan boyfriend, then, the Manhattan intensive undergraduate literary magazine.

Hence, the miraculous provision prayer, where you do everything Jesus says –like gathering a few fish and a few loaves loaves of bread and start handing them out and keeping them out and the whole crowd of 5000 is fed. In other words no matter how illogical, do what he says and then let him rip and wait on a miracle. Someone is saying to me, “…and wait to be transformed.”

(the miraculous provision prayer that I made in my mind about my mental social and emotional situation a few days before 9-11-2001.)

My brother didnt make it. Hurts.

He is one of 3 who harmed my son.

In Buffalo, NY, where Ian was born, I wrote, “I am that I am Said the Cradle to the pram. (Waste not Want not).”

what does this mean?

it was a paradigm shift off of New York City. Years before 9-11.