nccotus

a scientist will use one or more of his kids for scientific purposes. There was a rumor that Pavlov made his young daughter grow up inside a box until age 7.

so, I googled that and it’s not true. But he did build her a scientifically engineered bed to sleep and play in—or something like that. I am pretty sure it was Pavlov. The one who chained a dog to an electrically charged mat to demonstrate that it would lose its reflexes. When the dog was unchained the charge was kept on and he didn’t get up off of the mat. Sort of like me in the ICU in ‘86. My brain got fried by that intense hit of pain. When the catheter came out of me I just passed out and then died for a few minutes.

I just realized last night as I lay in bed resting from a raw egg food poisoning that I have been the designated recipient of the honor in my family to be the one to be used for experimental purposes. My mother didn’t want me. But she only ever let it go so far. She did care. And she would have helped me in the end. But she died. So suddenly.

Praying for Ian in all these regards…

I am so much more comfortable with my mother and father and how they handled things looking back with this perspective.

my mother was reading Kurt Vonnegut, “Cat’s Cradle” just before she died. I had gotten to page 90 or so and saw to give it to her. It’s about a Nobel science Prize Winner’s family WWII and related.

Praying for Ian in all these regards…

Aliens want us for our pain, woes and suffering and our sexuality. My alien encounter in 2020 and future encounters have been a compensation and consolation for all that I suffered and also a help with it. There is such a fantastically beautiful energy there.