nccotus

a lot of it was evil as an unclean thing came out of my heart, mind, body, and soul.

But there were some spectacular moments. The assumption experience. When I was lifted up like Mary as if dying. Then, the whole day I spent as Mary Magdalen as if in the cave over the sea being fed the Eucharist by birds as in the Golden legend.

there was a takeaway for Ian who is now experiencing his own compensatory sufferings and healing. There was also the Michael Jackson song, Man in the Mirror, which I heard with different words that night in the cottage: the man in the mirror was someone approaching him from behind as he looked in the mirror and the words took on a sinister meaning for instance I heard, “my broken bottom died.”

I don’t remember it now but Ian does.

the rest of it was hideous. But it was the price of my sanity and his. We will walk away from this hand in hand some day.