nccotus

I found myself in a cordial conversation with another elderly being whose wife had stepped off the floor; he mentioned that he had a Jewish background. I offered that I also had Jewish roots as well as Irish Catholic and Anglican.

the conversation ebbed as it moved towards New Years which is always horrible for me and I had to excuse myself on the note that I have PTSD of the holidays; although I love Christmas.

realizing that with that mixed up background the holidays aren’t going to be the greatest.

so I excused myself and stepped out to smoke.

I met a woman out there who gave me some information on another matter that helped me turn my mind to the fact that my father is an atheist in a way that I had long lost track if in a way that explained things to my heart, mind, and soul.

I came back in and told the elderly man I had been speaking with.

He said there is no God. Jesus was just a man. When you die you’re dead. Mary lied about the baby.

We always used to have a big tree but there was no meaning to it.

I became a Catholic Christian but had to fight him every step of the way.

The kindly older gentleman said, “Feel better.”

I realized through this person that my father was just intellectual and not to take him so seriously. He is a typical British rational socialist out of the water on American soil. His words are so hurtful taken out of context. The reality is that he is a little bit ignorant. It is a matter for St. Dymphna, the patron saint of the mentally ill and nervous disorders who had to flee her father. I was always Leary of her but recently, as I move into a more womanly character I have been seeking her help.